Re: Gender neutral - any new developments in your neck of the-- woods?
Yipes -- this reminds me of the arm-wrestling I did with my mother-in-law
over addressing wedding invitations. She insisted that the correct thing
to do was to only use Mrs. when you were also using the husband's name --
the whole name. As in, you could be Mrs. John Smith, *and* Ms. Jane Doe,
but never Mrs. Jane Smith. And, she being from New England, she was able
to put a disarming amount of conviction (and a prim, tight smile) behind
her use of the word "correct".
She didn't win that battle, but I still feel weird about the concession
that her 80-year-old, spinster aunt be referred to as Ms. Spinster Aunt.
New England, remember, and 80. I can't imagine she expected any form of
address except for "Miss".
Myself, I solve the gender-neutral problem with a steadfast use of the
second-person. It forces the active voice, it allows for a comfortable
but not breezy informality, and I never have to spend another moment
thinking "Well, the OED says using 'they' as a singular neuter pronoun is
okay, but I hate it and it's stupid. And only editors, tech writers, and
English professors pay attention to the OED anyway. What to do?"
On Monday, March 3, 2003, at 02:15 PM, Rock, Megan wrote:
Not to drag this even further off-topic, but what is the correct usage
of Ms.? A friend of mine who is divorced but still goes by her
married surname told me that she is supposed to use "Ms. Smith"
because her ex-husband remarried and his new wife is now the "Mrs.
Smith."
Valerie Priester
hammerl -at- buffalo -dot- edu
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