RE: Active vs. passive voice?

Subject: RE: Active vs. passive voice?
From: "Leonard C. Porrello" <Leonard -dot- Porrello -at- SoleraTec -dot- com>
To: "techwr-l List" <techwr-l -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- com>
Date: Thu, 27 Mar 2008 08:34:20 -0700

I agree with Geoff for the type of scenario he describes, where a user
is trying to get the given result. In other words, "Click the XYZ button
to display the EXY dialog box" is terrific when the user's goal is to
display the EXY dialog box.

In contrast, when the EXY dialog is merely feedback (and not the users
goal), I think you need to use another grammatical construction.

Regarding passive vs. active voice, there is no rule in English that
says that passive voice should be avoided, and dogmatic bias against the
passive voice is the earmark of an immature writer. Of course, reason
tells us that when you want someone to do something, the passive voice
isn't terribly clear or effective. It is effective, however, for saving
face or skirting blame ("mistakes were made"), and it is often very
effective in phenomenological terms (i.e., communicating user
experience). "When you've entered all of the necessary values, a blue
bunny will appear" tells the user exactly what he will experience (can
expect). In contrast, to say "the application will display a blue bunny"
adds only dead wood. Of course the application makes the blue bunny
appear. The user already knows that. He knows that he is using the
application.

BTW, I use "appears." Admittedly, it is evocative of the idea of magic
to some, but I've found it to be better than the alternatives.

Leonard C. Porrello
SoleraTec LLC
www.soleratec.com


-----Original Message-----
From: techwr-l-bounces+leonard -dot- porrello=soleratec -dot- com -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- com
[mailto:techwr-l-bounces+leonard -dot- porrello=soleratec -dot- com -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- c
om] On Behalf Of Geoff Hart
Sent: Thursday, March 27, 2008 8:16 AM
To: techwr-l List; Michelle Vina-Baltsas
Subject: Active vs. passive voice?

Michelle Vina-Baltsas wonders: <<I've read many threads on this
listserv related to the use of "appears" vs. "displays" or "is
displayed". During a meeting yesterday, with my fellow tech writers,
we had a heated discussion about whether we should use "is displayed"
or "displays" when writing a result (For example, "Select the XYZ
button. The EXY dialog box is displayed.")>>

Actually, I prefer "Click the XYZ button to display the EXY dialog
box" or its inverse: "To X, click Y". Simpler and clearer, and you're
not making any predictions about whether the dialog will actually
appear. Sometimes, best intentions notwithstanding, it doesn't.

Also, you don't select buttons: you click them. Only checkboxes and
radio buttons should be selected in a dialog (or items from dropdown
menus). It's an important distinction: selecting something merely
chooses it as a parameter of what happens next, but clicking a button
triggers an immediate action.

<<One writer insisted that the use of "is displayed" should not be
used because it is in the passive voice.>>

Yes, it's passive, and I'll avoid getting into the whole transitive/
intransive verb issue here. Passive voice is not inherently wrong,
particularly since the alternative is to constantly say "the software
then displays..." or similar wording. You can do that too, but
really, there are better solutions.


----------------------------------------------------
-- Geoff Hart
ghart -at- videotron -dot- ca / geoffhart -at- mac -dot- com
www.geoff-hart.com
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References:
active vs. passive voice: From: Michelle Vina-Baltsas
Active vs. passive voice?: From: Geoff Hart

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