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Subject:RE: Coworker who won't take no for an answer From:"Sean Brierley" <sbrierley -at- Accu-Time -dot- com> To:<techwr-l -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- com> Date:Wed, 30 Jul 2008 08:54:45 -0400
I disagree and still believe the first step is for the employee to
clearly and unambiguously decline the offer.
I also see a difference between someone ribbing someone about their kids
and someone making hurtful and pointed statements about their kids. The
information we have about the kids and everything else is useless
without context because I can say you're bad and mean you're good, etc.,
and our language relies on context and our interpersonal relationships
also rely on context.
Furthermore, I also see that each employee is a person with a right to
be their own person and if their actions are disruptive to another
individual, then some interpersonal skillz do have to come into play ...
people have to talk to people under awkward circumstances, imagine that!
I'm not making light of this issue, but it is unreasonable to think that
everyone can be the same clone with the same inherent understanding,
perceptions, motivations as everyone else. And, without that, there will
be uniqueness. And, with that uniqueness comes irritation. There's this
coworker I have who wears a shirt that's a shade of color I don't like
and every time I'm in a meeting with this guy, the shirt distracts me
and interferes with the smooth operation of my work environment in that
meeting -- off with his head!
I do think the original poster is in a difficult situation not of her
making. However, I also believe that through no fault of her own, the
first step has to be a clear, unambiguous, and in-person using talking
discussion in which she tells the irritant to stop irritating.
___________
Sean Brierley
Technical Writer
www.accu-time.com
-----Original Message-----
From: techwr-l-bounces+sbrierley=accu-time -dot- com -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- com
[mailto:techwr-l-bounces+sbrierley=accu-time -dot- com -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- com] On
Behalf Of Gene Kim-Eng
Sent: Tuesday, July 29, 2008 6:29 PM
To: techwr-l -at- lists -dot- techwr-l -dot- com
Subject: Re: Coworker who won't take no for an answer
"Context" is not relevant in a situation of this nature.
It is the perception of the person on the receiving end
of the behavior, especially if it continues after that
person has specifically asked that it stop. Any behavior
that interferes with the smooth operation of a work
environment is unacceptable, whether it is motivated
by a "crush" or just someone's obsession with
evangelizing their leisure time activities to the
uninterested, and it is always a management issue.
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