purpose of the apostrophe

Subject: purpose of the apostrophe
From: Ray Bruman <rbruman -at- RND -dot- RAYNET -dot- COM>
Date: Fri, 16 Dec 1994 16:43:24 PST

Dear Mister Language Person: What is the purpose of the apostrophe?

Answer: The apostrophe is used mainly in hand-lettered small business
signs to alert the reader than an "S" is coming up at the end of a
word, as in: WE DO NOT EXCEPT PERSONAL CHECK'S, or: NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR
ANY ITEM'S. Another important grammar concept to bear in mind when
creating hand- lettered small-business signs is that you should put
quotation marks around random words for decoration, as in "TRY" OUR HOT
DOG'S, or even TRY "OUR" HOT DOG'S.
-- Dave Barry, "Tips for Writer's"


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In Blythe, California, a city ordinance declares that a
person must own at least two cows before he can wear
cowboy boots in public.
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