ALERT: Virus Notes (fwd) (humor)

Subject: ALERT: Virus Notes (fwd) (humor)
From: Romay Jean Sitze <rositze -at- NMSU -dot- EDU>
Date: Thu, 22 Jun 1995 12:44:35 -0600

My son forwarded this little bit to me recently. Since I have not seen
it on the list in the past year, perhaps it will be as new to others as
it as to me.

RoMay Sitze, rositze -at- nmsu -dot- edu


---------- Forwarded message ----------
Date: 21 Jun 95 03:20:45 EDT
From: Robin D. Sitze <74151 -dot- 547 -at- compuserve -dot- com>
To Romay Jean Sitze <rositze -at- nmsu -dot- edu>, Kevin Sitze <ksitze -at- crl -dot- nmsu -dot- edu>,
Subject: ALERT: Virus Notes

Enjoy!

********************************************************************

NEW VIRUS ALERT: DESCRIPTIONS FOLLOW

PAUL REVERE VIRUS: This revolutionary virus does not horse around.
It warns you of impending hard disk attack---once if by LAN,
twice if by C:.

POLITICALLY CORRECT VIRUS: Never calls itself a "virus," but instead
refers to itself as an "electronic microorganism."

RIGHT TO LIFE VIRUS: Won't allow you to delete a file, regardless of
how old it is. If you attempt to erase a file, it requires you to
first see a counselor about possible alternatives.

ROSS PEROT VIRUS: Activates every component in your system, just
before the whole thing quits.

MARIO CUOMO VIRUS: It would be a great virus, but it refuses to run.

OPRAH WINFREY VIRUS: Your 200MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80MB,
and then slowly expands back to 200MB.

AT&T VIRUS: Every three minutes it tells you what great service you
are getting.

THE MCI VIRUS: Every three minutes it reminds you that you're paying
too much for the AT&T virus.

TED TURNER VIRUS: Colorizes your monochrome monitor.

ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER VIRUS: Terminates and stays resident. It'll
be back.

DAN QUAYLE VIRUS: Prevents your system from spawning any child
processes without joining into a binary network.

DAN QUAYLE VIRUS 2: Their is sumthing rong with your compueter, ewe
just can't figyour out watt. (Variant of the POTATOE VIRUS)

GOVERNMENT ECONOMIST VIRUS: Nothing works, but all your diagnostic
software says everything is fine.

NEW WORLD ORDER VIRUS: Probably harmless, but it makes a lot of
people really mad just thinking about it.

FEDERAL BUREAUCRAT VIRUS: Divides your hard disk into hundreds of
little units, each of which does practically nothing, but all of
which claim to be the most important part of the computer.
---------


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