"Appears" vs. "will appear"

[Brierley, Sean]

Click ABC. The XYZ dialog box opens.

I avoid the word appear. It's too magical. 

I try to use only the present tense. If needed, I use the simple past. I
avoid the future tense as much as I can, as it is usually unnecessary.

I also try to avoid writing that the goal of the instructions is to open
a dialog box; it's not. The goal is to perform some other task, and
opening the dialog box is part of that larger task. So, click ABC tells
what to do and that the XYZ dialog box opens provides feedback that the
correct task was done.

Make sense?

Cheers.

-----Original Message-----
From: techwr-l-bounces+sean.brierley=ipc.com at lists.techwr-l.com
[mailto:techwr-l-bounces+sean.brierley=ipc.com at lists.techwr-l.com] On
Behalf Of Lauren
Sent: Thursday, May 03, 2007 12:26 PM
To: 'Keith Hansen'; techwr-l at lists.techwr-l.com
Subject: RE: "Appears" vs. "will appear"

FWIW:  I avoid the use of the word "appear" altogether because is sounds
like the new window just manifests out of nothing.  Here is a No. 3
option.

"Click the ABC to open the XYZ dialog box."

Lauren
 

> -----Original Message-----
> From: techwr-l-bounces+lt34=csus.edu at lists.techwr-l.com
> [mailto:techwr-l-bounces+lt34=csus.edu at lists.techwr-l.com] On Behalf 
> Of Keith Hansen
> Sent: Thursday, May 03, 2007 9:11 AM
> To: techwr-l at lists.techwr-l.com
> Subject: "Appears" vs. "will appear"
> 
> I want to canvass your opinions here. Which do you prefer:
> 
> No. 1: "Click the ABC button. The XYZ dialog box appears."
> No. 2: "Click the ABC button. The XYZ dialog box will appear."
> 
> I prefer "appears." It's more concise (one word vs. two). Also, "will 
> appear" sounds like a future prediction, rather than a statement of 
> what occurs. Compare the following:
> 
> "The clouds gather. It rains." 
> "The clouds gather. It will rain."
> 
> Please vote for No. 1 or No. 2. Give reasons for your preference.
> 
> Thanks.
> 
> Keith
> 
> P.S. BTW, I had a colleague who abhorred the use of the word "appears"
> or "will appear." She said it made the process sound magical 
> ("Abracadabra! It appears!") So she would write a sentence like this:
> 
> "The XYZ dialog box is displayed by the software."
> 
> But this is passive voice (if I'm not mistaken; the subject is acted 
> upon, rather than acting). So the sentence was then rewritten like 
> this:
> 
> "The software displays the XYZ dialog box."
> 
> However, the subject of our sentence (software) is not really the 
> center of our attention here. The center of attention is actually the 
> dialog box, which is now shoved to the end of the sentence.
> 
> Personally, I can live with "appears"!


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