Grammar: "So" as a modifier

[arroxaneullman -at- aol -dot- com]

Hey all,

Another interesting grammatical conversation came up today. This time 
we discussed "so" as a modifier. For example, "We are so lost" (instead 
of "very?) or "That is so an inconvenience" (instead of "such"?).  I 
commented that this usage was incorrect, but really can't back it up 
with a grammatical rule.

If a grammatical rule for this situation exists, I have forgotten it. 
If it is acceptable, why does it sound so wrong? (Yes, I intentionally 
used it in a common phrase.)

FYI, the explanation in my Merriam-Webster's 
_Concise_Dictionary_of_English_Usage is rather roundabout and 
long-winded. What I gleaned is that it's antiquated, yet it appears to 
be recently revived in youth culture.


So, I'm just looking for a simple rule-of-thumb I can share with my 
grammatically handicapped peers.

Thanks to the TW Grammarians!

:)
Arroxane

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