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Do NOT try to "have a calm, professional conversation" with this
person. It's not possible unless you are in a position to fire her,
and maybe not even then. In fact, do not talk to her at all except
as absolutely required to get your work done.
Do not try to engage her in two-way conversation when she's being
loud and accusatory, and do not raise your voice in response to her.
Remember your mother's admonition about fighting when you were
a child ("it takes two"). If she hollers at you over the cubicle walls,
do not stand up, do not go to her. Remain at your desk, respond to
her accusatory questions directed at you with one word replies in low
monotone and do not respond to her "directed at the group" remarks
at all. Do not try to "get a word in edgewise." She should not merely
dominate a ranting exchange, but instead should be its sole participant.
If this person has been there longer than you and the rest of the group
has discussed the situation, odds are that your management already
knows all about her and lacks the necessary backbone to do anything
about it. If this is the case, the only thing you can do is ignore her and
concentrate on your work. If everyone does this, there's a good chance
that one day one of her rants will result in her popping a blood vessel
and being carted off by the EMTs.
Gene Kim-Eng
----- Original Message -----
From: "abby initio" <abby -dot- initio -at- gmail -dot- com>
> 3. My own instinct would be to have a calm, professional conversation with
> her directly, using all the listening techniques, but also setting firm
> boundaries such as waiting patiently when she interrupts, and then insisting
> on completing my thought. But this seems unlikely. She's just not the kind
> of person who will do this. She will yak on and on, wearing you down because
> you're always interrupting to try to get a word in to the point that it's
> just not worth it anymore. And she just doesn't come off as someone with
> whom you can talk.
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