The Edge of Greatness? (was "Errors")

[Geoff Hart <ghart -at- videotron -dot- ca>]

Dori Green wondered about the grammar of: <<LIFE, LIBERTY AND THE  
PURSUIT OF ALL WHO THREATEN IT. Dang, I can't just enjoy stuff like  
this any more.  With all the resources of the US Navy couldn't they  
have had an editor look at this before they slapped it up?>>

In fact, the only serious grammatical error is the "it" instead of  
"them", but the rest works just fine: it's a play (albeit a seriously  
cynical and misleading one) on Jefferson's famous "life, liberty, and  
the pursuit of happiness". Yeah, the Navy should've hired an editor,  
but unfortunately, we editors don't get no respect among the more  
manly professions. <g>


<<Nobody else cares that it isn't  LIFE.  LIBERTY. AND THE PURSUIT OF  
ALL WHO THREATEN THEM.>>

You edit, unfortunately, fixes one problem and introduces a couple  
others. But as a substantive editor, I'd be far more concerned about  
the message, which really doesn't work for me and is highly ethically  
suspect. But now I'm treading on political ground, not technical  
communication (other than in the sense that this message only works  
for certain audiences -- a weak tie-in at best), so please direct all  
flames off-list.


----------------------------------------------------
-- Geoff Hart
ghart -at- videotron -dot- ca / geoffhart -at- mac -dot- com
www.geoff-hart.com
--------------------------------------------------
Coming soon:  _Effective onscreen editing_ (http://www.geoff-hart.com/ 
home/onscreen-book.htm)

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